SCPantera on Second Person

[SCPantera]

Sympathetic Opposition has a couple novel takes on these ideas here that I'd be surprised if you hadn't seen already:

how and why to be ladylike (for women with autism) (https://www.sympatheticopposition.com/p/how-and-why-to-be-ladylike-for-women) has some what-were-extremely-novel-to-me insights on misogyny-as-wrenching-back-attention (that I comment much more on here: https://scpantera.substack.com/p/on-being-attracted)

and she had another banger on casual misandry as the sort of gender-inverted flip side of that called "misandry as cope" but she seems to have taken it down at some point

[Jacob Falkovich]

That's a great post by SympOpp!

My sense is that the reaction to hijacked attention would be more active hostility, not the resentful resignation of the incel. Like the "trad" misogynist ranting about locking up sluts or the PUA saying "oh you think you're manipulating me I'll show you what manipulation is". And what SympOpp is talking about is basically women broadcasting sexual availability while being unavailable, where it seems that incels are more mad at the women who are, indeed, very sexually available (but not to them).

[SCPantera]

Hmmm, I agree those are technically distinct but I also think it's not over-abstracting to suggest that they're in the same category. Like I think active hostility versus passive resentment is merely cope-in-the-moment versus preparatory cope. Perceived sexual availability is such a strong attention-hijacker that now the incel has to try to get ahead of it instead of just ignoring it and getting on with their lives.

My extrapolation on that idea was to wonder how much of reactionary negativity in general can be broadly classed as "something has (+/- unfairly) hijacked my attention [in a way I couldn't control] (and being mad about it is the [remedy and/or way I can justify continuing to let it hijack my attention voluntarily])".